Digvijay Singh’s amazing ability to excrete simultaneously through the oral as well as the anal cavity has finally caught the attention of the international scientific community. The 141 year old venerable scientific journal, Nature, deputed Dr. Ottavio Maino to investigate Mr. Singh’s anatomy to fully explain what the journal called one of the ‘missing links’ in human evolution. A release from Nature’s offices in London explained the interest that the scientific community has in this matter:
“Put simply, the human digestive system consists of the esophagus, stomach, small intestine and the large intestine through which food passes sequentially before solid waste is stored in the rectum until excretion via the anus. Mr. Singh seems to have a unique network of internal pipes and trapdoors that somehow links the excreta storage area back near the trachea. This causes Mr. Singh to push his faeces in both directions when customary pressure is applied and on which he has no control. As the trachea opens immediately below the larynx, which is the voice box, many a times Mr. Singh’s verbal diarrhoea is confused for speech. Also, as a consequence of this reverse movement; Mr. Singh’s digestive system is considerably longer than the usual nine meters resulting in faeces taking up to two years to reach the mouth instead of the usual 24-72 hour excretion via the anal opening. This causes his facial excretions to be particularly putrid with high levels of toxicity. In this Mr. Singh bears a close resemblance to the Hydra, which is a multi-headed, underwater parasite that also excretes through its mouth. While humans have evolved much beyond the tiny hydra, Digvijay Singh is its closest relative and may be a goldmine of information for evolutionary biologists.”
This news has caught the buzz of the nation with the Congress President honouring Mr. Singh with the Bharat Ratna for putting India on the world’s scientific map. Mr. Singh however remained humble as ever and said that this was not new and he has always maintained that he can excrete from his mouth for the past several years. He even claimed to have proof of the same though none seems to be needed with his nearest aides vouching his constitution. Journalists however are faced with the biggest quandary as they will have to distinguish between his statements (as the Congress general secretary) and his excretions. Mr. Singh seemed unperturbed that a section of the media has been unable to distinguish between the two for the past 40 years that he has been in public life. Digvijay Singh has also reportedly refused to undertake treatment for his condition if any is discovered during the course of the study saying that he is perfectly happy with shitting from his mouth.
“Put simply, the human digestive system consists of the esophagus, stomach, small intestine and the large intestine through which food passes sequentially before solid waste is stored in the rectum until excretion via the anus. Mr. Singh seems to have a unique network of internal pipes and trapdoors that somehow links the excreta storage area back near the trachea. This causes Mr. Singh to push his faeces in both directions when customary pressure is applied and on which he has no control. As the trachea opens immediately below the larynx, which is the voice box, many a times Mr. Singh’s verbal diarrhoea is confused for speech. Also, as a consequence of this reverse movement; Mr. Singh’s digestive system is considerably longer than the usual nine meters resulting in faeces taking up to two years to reach the mouth instead of the usual 24-72 hour excretion via the anal opening. This causes his facial excretions to be particularly putrid with high levels of toxicity. In this Mr. Singh bears a close resemblance to the Hydra, which is a multi-headed, underwater parasite that also excretes through its mouth. While humans have evolved much beyond the tiny hydra, Digvijay Singh is its closest relative and may be a goldmine of information for evolutionary biologists.”
This news has caught the buzz of the nation with the Congress President honouring Mr. Singh with the Bharat Ratna for putting India on the world’s scientific map. Mr. Singh however remained humble as ever and said that this was not new and he has always maintained that he can excrete from his mouth for the past several years. He even claimed to have proof of the same though none seems to be needed with his nearest aides vouching his constitution. Journalists however are faced with the biggest quandary as they will have to distinguish between his statements (as the Congress general secretary) and his excretions. Mr. Singh seemed unperturbed that a section of the media has been unable to distinguish between the two for the past 40 years that he has been in public life. Digvijay Singh has also reportedly refused to undertake treatment for his condition if any is discovered during the course of the study saying that he is perfectly happy with shitting from his mouth.
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